hiya kids....i decided that untill i can come up with some money to renew my subscription that iwll write in the journal for awhile
well let's see what is new with me
i am working at a kewl company got a promotion fairly quickly actually within 4 months of working there
got a new car a '91 prelude
that's about it really
sorry my life is really boring
i go to work then come home
i guess i go to karaoke everyonce and awhile

i love him
i hate him
i have always told that there is a fine line
between love and hate
i never understood that untill now
i want to be happy fully
but i wait to see
he tells me not to that he's not worth it
but as much as my head wants to belive him
my heart will not let go
i hate it
but that seems to be my fate for the moment
who knows maybe things will change
and i won't be the one who wishes...
hopes....
waits....

well, i guess i'm a few days late on this one. I am officially 25 as of the 27th on Nov. spent a good while of it in the car on the way home from WI. had lots of fun. i discovered a shot called the jolly rancher, ok i'd heard of it before but had never had one. i'm not sure how many i had but it was a lot of them. i was blitzed. i do remember the night though. spent it at Karaoke with my friends. my wonderful friend who will remane nameless but you know who you are. dedicated Closer by NIN to me. but hey what can one do but smile and turn red. hehehehehehe ok, i asked for the song, one b/c i love it, two b/c...
anywho, life is good i forget if i said last time if i moved out or not. i did, living with some awsome friends.
i have my x-mas list almost done. but i'm sure i will think of something else i need to get someone or something. it always happens that way. well, i guess i will go now as i have run out of things to say.

alright, i now own my car i have insurance as of tomorrow or something. but i have it. i have money left over so i don't feel like a poor poor person no more. life is looking up. i have a trip coming up which i am happy about. life is good again. hehehehehe
got an offer from a friend to be able to stay at his place for $200 and keep my job those were the two stipulations but not at all hard to keep.
my job is wearing on me a bit but i figure this time i need to stick it out b/c i always ditched jobs that i didn't like so i have had many jobs in my short history of work. this time i need to suck it up. hehehehehe
it wouldn't be so bad if management would stay the hell off my back though. they are idiots who annoy all of us on the floor. we would like it if they would go away and leave us to do our jobs. but then again i suppose people like that have always been my reason to quit jobs before. oh well, no more complaining i'm in a good mood for a change.

life has sent me another curve ball. but that's ok b/c i am going to beat the hell out of it. i'm going to continue on my merry way. i'm gonna try and get an apt for 6 mths. that way i can save my money and do some more research on getting an apt down in pheonix, AZ. i've realized that this lovely place i call home is really just not working out for me at all. i try and i try but this is just not really home. i always feel restless and the need to keep moving is becoming a bit much. i don't really feel as if this is the place for me. but the funny part is i always end up coming back here. hopefully when i make that next move it will be for good. but who knows. anywho, i have just a bit more to pay on my car then it will be all mine. mwahahahahaha
oh well, i guess it will be nice to have a place to call mine all mine for a while. but i have a feeling that coming home to an empty place is going to get to me after awhile. but i'll get over it. it's something that i should experience. all i know that is sometimes living here(and it's not bad here) i just long to be by myself. oh well, we will see which i like better. but then again having someone to live with who isn't going to want to talk all the time wouldn't be bad either. well, that's all my ranting today.

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